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← Families · Support

In danger right now? Call 911. Need to talk to someone now? Call or text 988, any time, day or night.

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Counseling · every grade, K-12

Counseling corner

Big feelings. Friend trouble. School worries. Changes at home. You do not have to handle them alone. Pick a tile.

What can I do right now?

Tap the one that sounds like you.

Sad feelings are OK. They come and go.
  1. Tell someone: “I feel sad today.”
  2. Do one small kind thing for yourself: a drink of water, a walk, a song.
  3. If sad stays for many days, tell your school counselor or a family adult.

More on feelings →

Worry is your body trying to keep you safe.
  1. Try balloon breathing for one minute.
  2. Ask: “What is one small step I can do?”
  3. Talk it out with a trusted adult.

Breathe with me →

Angry is a feeling. Hurting is a choice we do not make.
  1. Stop. Step away if you can.
  2. Breathe in 4, out 4. Squeeze and let go of your hands.
  3. Use words when you are calm: “I felt mad when…”

Calm-down tools →

Nobody should treat you that way. It is not your fault.
  1. Get away from it and go where adults are.
  2. Tell a trusted adult. If it is online, save a screenshot first.
  3. Use our report planner to write it down.

Make a plan to tell →

“Not yet” is part of learning.
  1. Pick one subject or one assignment to start with.
  2. Ask the teacher: “Can you show me one more way?”
  3. Ask the school counselor to help you make a plan.

School success tips →

Changes can feel big, even good changes.
  1. Name it: moving, a new baby, a loss, parents living apart, money worries.
  2. Keep your routines: sleep, meals, school.
  3. Tell your school counselor. They help with this every day.

Help with changes →

Your safety comes first.
  1. In danger right now: call 911.
  2. Need to talk now: call or text 988.
  3. Tell a trusted adult today. Keep telling until someone helps.

All the help lines →

Who can help you at school?

My grade:
Grades K-2

Grown-ups who help

  • Your teacher.
  • The school counselor: a helper for feelings, friends and school.
  • The school nurse, when your body feels sick or hurt.

You can say: “Can I talk to you?”

Grades 3-5

Your helpers

  • Your teacher and the school counselor.
  • The school psychologist and school social worker help too.
  • Every school has a Dignity Act Coordinator for bullying.

You can ask your teacher for a pass to see the counselor.

Grades 6-8

Your support team

  • School counselor: classes, friends, feelings, plans.
  • School psychologist: learning, behavior and mental health.
  • School social worker: links school, home and community help.
  • Dignity Act Coordinator: bullying and harassment reports.
Grades 9-12

Your support team

  • School counselor: your yearly progress review, courses, college and careers, stress.
  • School psychologist and social worker: mental health support and outside referrals.
  • Dignity Act Coordinator: harassment, bullying, discrimination.

School counselor

ASCA says school counselors are “certified/licensed educators” who make sure there are “academic, career and social/emotional development opportunities for each and every student.” They give short-term counseling and referrals for long-term support. ASCA recommends 250 students per school counselor.

School psychologist

NASP says school psychologists “apply expertise in mental health, learning, and behavior.” Many finish a specialist-level degree program (at least 60 graduate semester hours).

School social worker

NASW calls school social workers “the critical link between schools, homes, communities, and student outcomes.” They help link needed resources and remove barriers to learning.

Dignity Act Coordinator

Under New York's Dignity for All Students Act, at least one trained staff member at every school is the Dignity Act Coordinator. Their name and contact must be shared with students and families. How DASA works →

For families

What New York schools must offer

  • Every school district must have a comprehensive developmental school counseling program for all students in kindergarten through grade 12, and all K-12 students must have access to a certified school counselor (8 NYCRR §100.2(j)).
  • For grades 6 to 12, certified school counselors provide an annual individual progress review plan that reflects each student's educational progress and career plans. For a student with a disability, it must be consistent with the IEP.
  • Districts write district-wide and building-level counseling plans, updated every year, and have an advisory council that meets at least twice a year.
  • New York health education must include mental health (Education Law §804, amended in 2016 and 2017).

How to reach the counselor

  1. Call the school's main office and ask for your child's school counselor by grade or last name.
  2. Or email the teacher and ask them to connect you.
  3. Say what you notice, since when, and what you hope for.
  4. Ask for an interpreter if you want one.
Dear [counselor's name], I am [your name], parent/caregiver of [child's first name] in grade [grade]. I have noticed [what you see] since [when]. Could we talk by phone or meet this week or next? The best way to reach me is [phone or email]. Thank you, [Your name]

Good questions to ask

  • “Who is my child's counselor, and how do students ask to see them?”
  • “May I see the school's counseling plan?”
  • “Who is the Dignity Act Coordinator here?”
  • “Does the school have a school psychologist or social worker my child can see?”
  • “What outside help do you suggest, and is it free?”

Goal100 never asks for or stores information about your child's feelings or health. The tools in this section run only in your browser. Anything chosen (like the grade buttons) stays on this device.

For teachers

When to refer

  • Changes that last: pulling away, sleep or energy changes, grades dropping, more worry or anger. (See signs from NIMH.)
  • Any talk of wanting to die, self-harm, abuse or not being safe: do not wait. Use your building's crisis and reporting steps the same day. See Get help now: teachers.
  • Bullying, harassment or discrimination: oral report within one school day, written within two (DASA). See DASA steps.

What NYS asks of schools

  • K-12 comprehensive developmental school counseling program; K-5 program designed by a certified school counselor with teaching staff and pupil personnel service providers; grades 6-12 annual individual progress review plan (8 NYCRR §100.2(j)).
  • Mental health is part of required health education (Ed Law §804; 8 NYCRR §135.1, §135.3).
  • NYS SEL Benchmarks: 3 goals (self-awareness and identity; relationships and belonging; decision-making and well-being) in bands K-2, 3-5, 6-8, 9-10 and 11-12.

In class every day

  • Use a quick feelings check-in with no names and no scores. Our feelings thermometer saves nothing.
  • Teach one calm-down tool and practice it when everyone is calm.
  • Post the counselor's name, the Dignity Act Coordinator's name and 988.

More: Teacher support.

Sources

General information to help students, families and teachers. It is not medical, mental health or legal advice, and it does not replace your school counselor, school psychologist, school social worker, doctor or a licensed professional.

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